Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! Where on earth did Osama go? With the surplus, Goddamit no! Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! Blame al Qaeda, Dick says no! Rumsfeld says Saddam must go! Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! Stem cell Nancy, Just Say No! Mass distraction, NWO! Eeny-meeny-miney-mo! - September 30, 2002

Despite claims she was "misinterpreted," Germany's Justice Minister Herta Daeubler-Gmelin resigned September 23, 2002 following an international fuhrer furor that arose after she compared President Bush to Hitler for threatening war to distract from domestic problems. Can't think why. Hitler was shorter.

President George W. Bush, bedecked with a Big Apple lapel pin, in Manhattan’s financial district, Tuesday July 9, 2002, signed an executive order creating what he called a "financial crimes SWAT team" at the Justice Department. Michael Jackson wants an end to pedophilia as well.

On June 25, 2002, President Bush called for New Palestinian Leadership to lead the Israelis and Palestinians to the land of milk, honey, Starbucks and Coca Cola in a speech Karen Hughes refined, almost understood, and Ari Fleischer neither understood nor could articulate.