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Sunday, November 19, 2006

If We Had Ethics

Judith Regan was feeling quite shitty
For a bitch that just isn’t that pretty
With her blow-job lips pursed
A martini she nursed
The most hated from city to city

Utterly lacking in charm and in grace
She thought she would mention in case
Though Nicole had been bashed
And her throat had been slashed
She, Judith, was once punched in the face

Why I did it?” her response thought so smart
Some word play to tug at the heart
Offering lame justifications
And detestable recriminations
To feign her intentions had heart

Not many found an O.J. book sunny
Exploitation, she says, not for money
A book launch commotion
And a Fox News promotion
Toxic tell-all sweet coated in honey

When I interviewed him all I could think
Not how much lower I’d sink
Ron and Nicole in my heart
Like a sulfurous fart
This new low has a terrible stink

From a former National Enquirer “reporter”
Who clearly has not lost a daughter
To violence or rage
Her indignant outrage
Like air kissing lambs before slaughter

I didn’t pay him, so did nothing wrong
But a third party to whom rights belong
Goldmans, Browns, not a dime
But they’ll thank me in time
I bring closure to make everyone strong

As altruistic as Timothy McVeigh
Blowing mothers and babies away
Regan’s self-centered whining
And her impeccable timing
If she did it, it was for JonBenet

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If We Had Ethics

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New York Postmortem


 
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